18.02.26 first day of internship - cancer research

just by the window, i see the reflection of myself being superimposed with the dried up tree being illuminated by the ground light bottom-up. i am wondering if trees have feelings- do they feel restless when their leaves started to wilt and fall down? do they feel saddened when people are no longer adoring their flowers when they are all gone? do they shiver and shudder under the freezing cold breeze when they’re now naked with no warmth to cover them up?

if only trees can talk, perhaps we can learn a lot more about life.

and just like trees, our life consist of phases- when we are thriving, when we are blooming, when we are wilting, and when we have nothing else on ourselves.

maybe they’re made ‘silent’, so we can think about the lessons ourselves. because when we are told, we never listen- typical arrogance of human beings.

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I was on my way back from my work place. It is my first day of offline internship, which coincides with the first day of ramadan, masya Allah (: after much drama and hurdles due to my low immunity test (that blocks me from doing any laboratory work), countless visit to the doctor, taking blood test and shots of vaccination (okay maybe i’m just being dramatic), I am finally cleared of the access to start working in the lab, alhamdulillah (:

i was very stressed out in the past few months, trying to find a place that can host my for my internship- i was ready to settle down in any- as long as i got a spot. But alhamdulillah, Allah was being very generous in putting me in one of the most incredible and most exciting lab, where i will be working on cancer neuroscience- specifically glioma brain cancer! I know deep down I’ve always had this immense fascination towards human brains, and now I am able to work in the lab where they pioneer niche research topics in this field! I can’t wait to work more alongside these amazing people and learn from them on how to be a truly ‘scientist’, insya Allah (:

today was the first day, so it was quite chill. Since there was some IT problem, I was not able to access my work email yet (sadly), which kinda put me back from doing any (tedious) administrative work (and some trainings i need to take!). So, tomorrow I will be back to the lab to settle this. Andddd I will start shadowing some other researchers on their experiments!! I will be learning about the expansion microscopy (where you expand a sample in a special gel to visualise small molecular structures in high resolution with fluorescence), HIC (histo-immunochemistry staining of samples), and hopefully some imaging of brainods (lab-made brain!!). Lots of exciting stuffs to explore!

Soooo, i gotta be more rajin and read more literatures and watch a ton of youtube videos to prepare tonight!

The 9y-old me would never thought that I will be working on such… imporant thing- to contribute in finding the cure for cancer, and to work at the largest German scientific institution alongside amazing and brilliant researchers, alhamdulillah ala kulli hal.

Though the road will be bumpy and full of challenges, may Allah ease everything amin…

To starting off a new chapter, bismillah <3

Bgm: quiet room by oh hye joo

18:03,

heidelberg germany