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Little Forest (2018) Movie Review + Thoughts

20 Sept 2022

I stumbled upon a post on instagram about this movie, and spontaneously asked my best friend to watch it with me online despite living at the opposite side of the world.


In fact, I’ve been eyeing and putting my nose in this movie for the longest time, because I am an admirer of Kim Tae-Ri, her choices of the project are always remarkable, not in the sense of those resulting in blockbuster-kind of success, but there is always this profound, bittersweet trails of the projects she has chosen.




My thoughts:

Hye-Won is a burnt-out college graduate, who stumbled past her dream of becoming a teacher. Eventually, she came back to her quaint little town that she’s been sickly wanting to escape in the past. Through her point of view, we get to experience her dwelling from initially wanting to just stay downtown for a few days, which stretched until the change of seasons and ultimately spending a whole year there.


I think all of us could relate to her at some point. Especially if we are living far away from home, in the vibrant and hectic busy life in the city, to pursue our studies, dreams and works. It took a lot of effort and sacrifices to finally fly out from the cozy nestle, brushing against the cold and harsh wind to get where we are now. But sometimes, there are times we got weary from trying to survive all the time, to be on the fly-and-fight mode each day, that the thought of ‘maybe it would be better if we’re at home now’ would come across.


Though Hye-Won left everything behind and came back to ‘square-one’, her story afterwards doesn’t dance in a sombre tone, but also not in a hopeful manner like other mainstream stories that turn it into superficial-forced feelings, but rather, it is the feeling of comfort that is found back when she revisited her root. That’s what I appreciate a lot from the movie. Oftentimes, in this cliche-coming-home trope, the protagonist would encounter a series of existential storms delving into episodes of disappointments and regrets. However, her story did not take us down that road, but rather let us float along the natural flow without having the need to slide through the bumpy emotional wave crashes foremostly. 


I guess this raw, real, unsuperficial sentiment struck deep inside my heart. Because it felt too real. I think that is the beauty of this movie, how it can make you resonate deeply, but not in an ‘artificial’ way that makes such extreme tugs in your inside, but rather, it is just as if a random stranger unexpectedly handing you a cup of hot tea on a cold snowy day. It is not something huge or extravagant, but that simple act of kindness just warms your heart and leaves a smile on your face.


 I think that’s what this movie is like for me.







Food and Souls

We perceive food as an essential (which is ofc the truth), but also a sort of enjoyment. However, for homemade cook, it’s profoundly connecting us emotionally to the warmth and love, whether it is the homemade food made by our mother, grandmother, or even ourselves. Knowing that the meal is made intentionally for our own appetite, not someone else's, there’s so much sincerity in it. 


Hae-Won told her best friend she came back to the town because she’s hungry.


“Instant food didn’t fill me up. I meant it when I said I came back because I’m hungry.”


When you live in a big city away from your loved ones and have the need to cater to your own self, you eventually realise the privilege of having food made by your loved ones. When you are struggling to make the ends meet, eating a nice simple meal is a huge privilege. Living in a huge city, it’s easy to get dragged by the hustling, fast-paced culture of modern society. To put it in an uglier sense, it feels like you’re living as a rat. It took so much energy and time to care for making your own meal as it feels like you’ll be losing the time to run to catch something else. Hence, it is the truth when Hae-Won said she’s coming back because of hunger. The hunger for warmth, nutritious, intentionally-made food and the satisfaction from slowing down and made time to care for your body and soul.  


A significant portrayal made in the movie is the stark differences between her life in Seoul and in her hometown. In Seoul, the scenes are pictured in a dim, darker and still mode. Whilst in her hometown, we can feel the bursts of sunshine, cosiness, and amiability radiating from the nature. This signifies how tough life is in the city, and it keeps draining her more and more.


“In nature, there is no hurry, everything happens at its own pace.”

Japonoshophy (Review of Little Forest movie - Japanosophy)







What Lee Jae-Ha Said


“Keeping yourself busy like that won’t solve your problems.”


I felt this to the core. I would say keeping myself busy is my best coping mechanism after indulging in heart-rending reading and show-watching. However, life is life. You can’t shut your eyes and pretend them as imperceptible. Howbeit, I wouldn’t say confronting every single problem is a wise choice either. There are distinguishments between difficulties, troubles, problems, crises and concerns. There are degrees of urgency and worthiness in facing it. But from this quote, it’s evident that some things are just inevitable. They shouldn’t be kept away for so long, as the untreated wound will be pungent and become uglier if left for so long. A problem could trigger others to arise, which will eventually bite us back wholly in the end. 



Face your fear and the reality, even if it seems daunting- a note to myself. 





I didn’t think much when watching the movie, it just gives me momentary peace of mind amidst the havoc of my life now. However, by writing this, more thoughts and reflections come streaming, wandering in my mind as if a person just turn on the faucet and left it unattended. I guess I like this movie much more now than before. 



So, if you are someone who feels a bit dreaded of this life, give it a shot, it might land in your heart.




*all gifs are credited to various tumblr accounts!


"Since it's my dream, I do it because I want to" / ODG: How's it like to be Forbes' 30 Under 30 Asia

29 Aug 2022

 Just a lazy sunday, I was searching for a video to watch whilst doing my laundry and I stumbled upon a video by ODG titled "How's it like to be Forbes' 30 Under 30 Asia".


The main guest of this video is Kim Yun Hwan, the founder and CEO of the start-up Taling, which is a talent-sharing mobile app that has been garnering a lot of users and investors during the past few years. 


I really love the interaction between Kim Yun Hwan and the kids. I think it really is a good thing to connect little kids with inspiring people so they can start to dream and walk towards the path too. Oftentimes, it seems like those people who are very successful are standing on the top of the pyramid and unreachable, but I love how humble Kim Yun Hwan is and how he is comfortable to open up and share his struggles, to show the harsh reality of achieving your dreams. 


I am always inspired by people who already realise their dreams, set it into goals and striving towards the path they're paving to reach them. And in this case, how Kim Yun Hwan and his friends started their own start-up company from scratch, especially when they started when they were university students. This reminds me of the K-drama Start-Up, which is one my favourite drama in the dream-inspiring category (though sadly during the last half of the drama they focused more on the useless love triangle, rather than their growth individually and as a team😓).


I wasn't expecting to enjoy this video as I am not a business student, or even have a plan to initiate a start-up company, however, through watching this video I realised that I can relate and resonate well with what he's saying because we share the same goals; 


to make your dreams come true. 



There are several takeaways from this video that I would like to pinpoint:



1. "They feel bad for me"

As a person who is working towards their dream from early on, it is natural that you might distance yourself from others at some points. To have your own time to build a plan and take little steps towards your goals; be it reading & researching about the particular things you want to achieve, honing the skills needed to make it happen, joining webinars, talk from inspirational people, or doing internships or side gigs to support your journey. From the third-person point of view, it might seems like you are running on a treadmill, like a hamster circling the wheel non-stop without gaining actual rewards. You spent most of the times looking forwards for your dream that might seems too big" or 'unachievable', not hanging out and having fun, instead you busy yourself with all these stuffs-


"I feel bad for you."


That's what the others said. They pity you. 


"Why stress over your life? Just enjoy life and keep it slow." 


Though a partial of it is true, but for some people who dream sooo big and has been keeping it for sooo long, I don't want to waste my youth knowing that I already have all the resources and abilities that could be honed from now to start. Even though these things does not generate an 'income' or instant rewards, but, I know that all the tiny steps I'm taking now will lead to a greater cause in the future because little drops of water makes a mighty ocean (:

Hence, I can totally understand him when he said that even though people feel bad for him for choosing such a rough path from early on, but he knows himself the best as he already have this concrete vision and goals to achieve. 




2. "Since it's my dream, I do it because I want to"

People are persistent when they are doing the things they love. When they are given the chance, the courage to dream, they will go all out to achieve it. It's always inspiring to look at those successful people living their dream, but that's just the tip of the iceberg we're witnessing. In reality, they have struggled a lot to climb the mountains, to be where they are now. They sacrificed a lot along the way. 


"If that's so, why don't you just take a simpler path without troubling yourself?"


Maybe that's a feasible solution. However, not to those with dreams. Having the courage to dream in the first place, is a step closer to your dream. Not everyone has the courage for it. When Kim Yun Hwan was asked about how he cope with all the obstacles and pities by the others, he said that 


''Because it's my dream. I do it because I want to. I made my own decision so I shouldn't be scared."


It is not just about getting the end result, but it is also about the process, the journey, that turns the result more meaningful. It is the satisfactory feelings you got every time you achieve those small little goals that will eventually lead to your biggest goal. Every time I feel frustrated or hopeless about my situation, I tell myself again that I was the one who decided this, I was the one who chose to walk this path, I was the one who worked hard until now, it was no one's but mine, so I shouldn't be scared. 




3. "I'm here now, what's next"

Along the times, your dream changes and becomes bigger. Maybe at some points you finally achieve your long-yearned dream, but, is it really the end? You'll keep thinking on your next steps. As your priorities change, so does your goals in life. If you imagine looking at the mind map of your life dreams from a vantage point far away, it will look like a messy tangled spider webs, indicating each of the silks intertwining with each other. Meaning that even though your goal and way (the silk) changes along the way, it still collectively create a huge 'spider web' of your ultimate end dream. 

Kim Yun Hwan expressed that at some points he felt afraid for the future, "I've came this far and done this for 7 years, can I still continue it for the rest of my life?''. We feel like we have done our best, keeping the momentum all time to finally reach this high point, but, will we still be able to maintain this for the rest of our life? 

I think for this, we need to have a mindset of 'self-growth', to let our mind be open for all possibilities for the future. For me personally, to be able to study abroad is my long-time dream since I was very young. I finally achieved it, but at what cost? I realised that the past-me has been in this toxic-relationship with my own self for the academic validation, well- I mean I still have it, but, I try to be more mindful and not considering the path to my ultimate goal to be a linear one. Even though it is obvious that in order to achieve my ultimate goal is by working hard and studying in the academia, BUT, there are so much more apart from academia, that I should put effort in, that would eventually help me to achieve my goals too in the end. 

I might not keep the same momentum as I was before, but I try to think more strategically and build my 'master plan' carefully and mindfully so that I would not be burned out in the process.




4. "Going home is scary"

A kid asked him "Do you ever feel like stopping everything?".

He said, of course, after all he is just a human-being. But despite that, whenever people are telling him to give up, it makes him more tempted to even be successful. 


"Going home is scary," he said. 


Especially when you have ventured far away, "what if it didn't work out? what if everything is in vain?". This reminds me to a drama that I'm watching right now which is 'Because It Is My First Life'. By the end of episode 3, the female protagonist, Yoon Ji-Ho was called by her mother, saying that if things doesn't work out, it is fine to go back home again. It is comforting. However, it feels terrible to do so, after everything you have done and all, it is hard to succumb back to square one and leave everything you have built so far. Just when she was about to take the bus home, a sudden realisation strucked her mind, "someone here finally says that he needs me, I am needed." So without ruminating much and making excuses, she grabbed the one last chance even though it differs from her 'former' dream. To start again and do her very best (:

By the end of this video, the young girl told him;


Just think like this: I’ve come all the way here and giving up will be a waste. I should just push through a little more and decide later. 


I find it very endearing how a small kid could think that deeply, she is very wise for her age that it makes me embarrassed of my own pessimistic thinking. Even an innocent kid thinks that way, why do we adults tend to give up so fast? 




END-THOUGHTS

I think it is very courageous for people to keep on chasing their dreams. The burning passion in the heart, it is impossible to extinguish, it only take the worst of the worst case to put it out. As long as the heart keeps beating, you will cling to your life purpose, for whatever that may be. 

I am very glad to stumble upon this video. It lights up something in my heart and mind, to encourage myself to keep going despite what other people say about it. Because in the end of the day, you are the one who knows yourself the most, and then one who will trust yourself fully till the end of your life (:



Watch the full video here! Though it's inspiring, the editing is very humorous and will make you day better! 



Law School Episode 12 Thoughts!!!

26 Aug 2022

Hello everyone!


Few weeks ago, I've finished this one drama JTBC Law School. I am not a fan of legal drama as I find myself always getting lost in the process of it, my mind is too slow to catch up the fast-pace storyline of legal dramas. I've watched some before, but never particularly being too much invested into it. This is the very first legal drama that my mind actually enjoy! Though the main premise is about revealing the truth of the murder of Professor Seo Byung Ju, I would say that wasn't the main focus of this drama. One by one, the story unravel the truth and secrets of each of the students (that epic squad), each of them have their own backstory and goals they want to achieve. And coincidentally, all are related to Prof Seo Byung Ju. His death was the trigger of the further action taken by the students.


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I've written a rant on this one episode that literally keeps me on the edge of my sit the whole hour, and let me ponder upon it for a long time;

SPOILER ALERT (Episode 12) !!!



1. Power manipulation over law 

As we can see, that scumbag Assemblyman Ko diverted all the media attention to Bad Fama Case. He garnered all his resources to sweep his son's case under the rag. It disgusted me to see the law OBEYED down to his power even though law supposed to possess the authority power above everything. This reflects the sickening situation in our world where the law only protects those who have the power, and instead, did injustice to the poor citizens. It was utterly satisfying to see Professor Attorney Yang to go against the odd and won the trial without any dirty tactics, instead just sticking to the facts and logic. As usual, I am the most invested during Professor Yang's courtroom/lecture session. The fact he got to pull back the audiences judgement from getting swayed by the crafted story of the prosecutors, to stick to the fact and logic reasoning amazed me. Also, I love how the juries leaned to Professor Yang's explanation of ''beyond reasonable doubt'' by the end of the trial, which pretty much explains his internal skills in lecturing criminal law in a simpler form even for those who have the slightest knowledge of the legal terms! 

This reminds me to a famous saying: 

''If you can't explain it to a six year old, you don't understand it yourself''. 

- Albert Einstein 


I can't wait for Assemblyman Ko AND his son to get pushed down the hill of destruction and shame. Gosh knows what disaster could be with the existence of those kind of monsters in our society, even worse when possessing the POWER above citizens' life!



2. Professor's Yang Undivided Attention Towards His Students

As we all know. He is notorious popular as the 'Killer Lecturer' aka Yangcrates. Yup as in Yang (His Last/Family name) + Socrates, the notable Greek Philosopher. Though torturing students the most mentally is what they see of him, but deep inside, he actually have a great attention and care towards his own students. And obviously he won't say it out aloud nor admit it.


He would be the epitome of  "Action speak louder than words."


   Though he is cornered in the corner because of his trial, he still came out and volunteered to be Ye-Seul's lawyer when no lawyer dare to represent her in afraid of Jerk Ko. His decision of requesting a jury trial was a double-edge sword decision, but we all know he would never take a risk without having an incredible plan in the back of his mind. 

   I think the most emotional scene was when he 'resigned' as her lawyer, because 'his client herself is not defending herself'. He turned the situation into lecturer-student interrogation situation just like in his usual lecturers, driving Ye-Seul into objectively study her own case. Though it was mentally cruel, but it was the last strike needed for Ye-Seul to make her own breakthrough and save herself. 

Which brings me to the last discussion;



3. Ye-Seul Defying The Victim-Blaming Projection

Since the start of the accident, she's been apologizing to that jerk ex of her as she still believes that it was her fault. The people on his side has been keeping her on edge by manipulating her into thinking she committed a fatal crime and responsible for life. But after Professor Yang turned the trial into his 'lecture' session in which they are 'studying' Ye-Seul's case, he let Ye-Seul to break through her situation and see herself objectively from a third-point-of view.


   You know that we tend to give advice or a way out to others easily, but not to ourselves when we are in a freaking same situation? It's because we are trapped in our own jumble of feelings and judgements, clouded by these internal and external factors that impeded us from helping our own self from the disasters.


   I think Professor Yang's way of leading her to see her own self from the third eyes help her to think more rationally and not be apologetic to whatever guilts she had before. And this was the scene that leaves me in awe. And makes me realize how easy it is for people to set us in this cage of self-blaming, projecting all the blames to the 'self-prisoner' in the cage, rather than extending a hand to help.


   I'm really glad that in the end, Ye-Seul managed to stand on her own feet, defending her own self without needing to depend on the others. The writer is so brilliant to make the event turn this way. It's even more impactful than letting Professor Yang giving out logic arguments that could turn the trial over in a second, finishing it all by once. Insted, the writer-nim let Ye-Seul to shine and hold the ultimate power. I think this scene was so gripping and emotional, and I hope this will inspire the poor souls who are in the same situation of her to stand up and defy all the resistance. 


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Updates:

The last time I wrote this was on August 2021, and now it is the end of August 2022! I got tired of writing halfway because of the spiralling emotions inside me that is hard to explain by writing which got me frustrated because I was unable to convey my entire feelings and thoughts! ANyWay, after almost a year I came back to this draft that has been hiding in my blog for a year, and I think, it is actually already completed? I actually just need to refine a lil bit and just click the PUBLISH button. Being a perfectionist, it doesn't really baffle me why I left this when it was already 90% completed lol. But I think this is still worth it to be read by people, so.... here we go!



Please share me your thoughts too on this drama <3 I would love to read them! 



*pict courtesy of Pinterest








Erasmus+ Croatia Experience 2022




About 1.5 months ago whilst dealing with the final exams of my language preparatory year, I applied to Erasmus+ Youth Exchange programs for the first time in my life. And thankfully I was accepted to a project which resonates well with what I am interested in; healthcare, medicine and diseases.

 

Just 2 weeks ago, I was at a small cozy town of Samobor in Croatia with about 50 inspiring youths from 5 countries; Spain, Turkey, The Netherlands, Croatia and Romania. We came together to exchange ideas and organise workshops whilst having fun and creating the best memories together. Since it was my first time joining such a program, I did not know what to expect, nor to prepare. Hence, I am writing this to document my experience there and for you to catch a glimpse on how this project works! 


TABLE OF CONTENTS:

1.0 What is an Erasmus+ Youth Exchange Project? 

2.0 “Sweet, Sweet Life Project”

        2.1 What Did I Learn (Objectives)

        2.2 What Did I Learn (Self-reflection)

3.0 Tips For An Introvert

4.0 For The Future: What Aspects I Would Like To Expand, My Expectations



1.       WHAT IS AN ERASMUS+ YOUTH EXCHANGE PROJECT?

 

According to the European Youth Portal

“Youth exchanges will give you the possibility to live together with other youngsters for a short period of time and to work together on a common project. You’ll take part in activities like workshops, debates, intercultural evenings, sportive and artistic activities, role-plays, meetings with the locals, outdoor activities and much more. Finally, your learning experiences will be recognised through a Youthpass, a tool which recognises learning outcomes from youth work and solidarity activities.”

 - by Erasmus+ Youth Exchanges: all you need to know | European Youth Portal (europa.eu)

 

So, it is basically an exchange program that allows you to mingle with youths of different nationalities to gain and exchange knowledge about a particular topic in accordance to the objectives of the project, a.k.a, a fun and engaging way to learn about life! 




2.  “SWEET, SWEET LIFE PROJECT”

The program I joined is called “Sweet, Sweet Life” and the project focuses on the awareness of diabetes and healthy lifestyle. I am glad to be able to join this as health and diseases is also my interest, especially since I’ll be studying biochemistry in the university, this would be really beneficial for my external knowledge! I was sent as a delegate of the Romanian team by a lovely Romanian Youth organization called Asociatia ASTRID. This project was organised by a Croatian organization called Impress

 

This whole project took place at a lovely and cozy hostel called Hostel Samobor, which is located just a few minutes walk from the city centre! We spent our days there for 9 days from 1st of August till 9th of August. I really enjoyed my stay there as the place is really beautiful and accessible. 


Though the project is about diabetes and joined by a lot of people from medical background (a lot of medical students), the workshops and activities weren’t heavy and stoic. In fact, it was so chill yet we gained a lot of new knowledge. We learnt stuffs and also unlearnt the misconceptions and stereotypes of diabetes, working in a team to solve problems, exchanging thoughts and personal experiences, addressing the real life issues concerning diabetes, and the list goes on! My personal favourite is the discussion session when we get to pitch in our own ideas and listen to different points of views, which collectively and ultimately result in a thought-provoking momentum!



DETAILS OF THE PROJECT

The aim of this project is to bring together young people with and without diabetes in order to empower each other, to become more aware about challenges people with chronical health conditions (in this case diabetes) face and to try to change the perspective on which diabetes is perceived in society.


Date: 1-9 August 2022

Place: Samobor, Croatia


Our first picture together


2.1 WHAT DID I LEARN (OBJECTIVES)

O1: to learn about diabetes together and to understand it better

= For sure I learnt a lot about diabetes, ranging from medical facts, personal experiences from diabetic participants (note= everyone has their own journey and experience! You can’t make an assumption and conclusion just based on one diabetic person), and debunking the myths of living with diabetes (ex= diabetics can’t consume sugar at all, a TOTAL MYTH, sugar; glucose and carbs are essential for every organism). Since the participants are from different backgrounds and specialities, we were able to exchange information more efficiently and in a holistic way. 

 

O2: to provide space to discuss about diabetes openly: views, experiences, feelings, uncertainties etc.

= A very needed opportunity to openly exchange ideas and inputs is what I am most grateful of during this project. This allows us to deepen our initial knowledge about diabetes, be more critical in ingesting new information, and improve the multi-cultural understandings that would differ the way each culture perceives and thinks of diabetes. 

 

O3: to break the taboo of living with chronic health condition such as diabetes and to learn how to react positively in certain situations

= Oftentimes, we perceive people living with diseases in a not so positive light, such as associating them with poor lifestyle, the inability to take care of their health, or even throwing audacious assumptions just based on their outer appearance. However, through listening directly from the personal experiences of people suffering from certain diseases (not just limited to diabetes) from this project, it teaches us to be more empathetic and mindful towards others as every diabetic person has different journey and struggles!

 

O4: to emphasise the relevance of living a balanced life in preventing (or handling) diabetes: eating healthy and balanced, sleeping enough, doing sports, avoiding stress etc.

= Through all the workshops collectively, we got to learn the various aspects of life that affect our health. The inputs and advice shared from the workshops are very crucial for us to be more mindful of everything to live a healthy life. In particular, the stress management sessions are necessary as frequently, we tend to dismiss the stress and cope through it in an unhealthy way without realising that it’s slowly reducing the quality of life and making us more prone to sickness and diseases. 



Presentation about a food product we came up to facilitate diabetic people

2.2 WHAT DID I LEARN (SELF-REFLECTION)

Joining this project has definitely grown me a lot as a person. Especially when you are suddenly thrown into a sea of people (in this case, ~50 people) from different nationalities and backgrounds, living with them for a straight 9 days, it forced you to go out of your comfort zone and be open to new experience!


1. Be more aware and emphatic towards the diabetics!

Diabetes is a metabolic disorder that can't be seen with the naked eyes, hence, we'll never know if someone around us is suffering from it unless we're getting informed beforehand. Oftentimes, they have the internal struggle that makes them feel the need to 'prove' their sickness because without the visible symptoms, the others in their circle will take it lightly or just brush it off which makes it harder for them to voice out their dietary concerns and explain it to the people. Hence, we need to be more aware and be open to those who are suffering from diabetes and other auto-immune diseases so that they do not feel excluded or 'unfit' to socialise with the others!


2. Intercultural communication

= Being in a huge group of diverse people of different nations, it is very important to be more culturally-aware towards one another. It’s necessary to set a mind of openness and tolerance, because we are not brought up in the same aquarium. Hence, having empathy and tolerance is very essential to avoid misunderstandings and cultural miscommunication! 



3. Set a growing mindset!


= At some points, there are times when I feel inadequate or not outspoken and confident enough like the others. But after finishing the project, I realised that it was such a dumb thing to succumb to those feelings and ruminate about it all time! This project is a place for you to grow yourself as a person, no matter in what aspect it is, you will not be the same person as when you first came to the project.


 Everyone has their own struggles so don’t be too hard on yourself (: 


Especially if it is your first project, it is totally understandable you will feel lost most of the time. Just go with the flow and see how you transcend to a new version of yourself. 



4.  Balancing Between Socialising and Reflection


= To be thrown into a sea of 50 people and having to spend a whopping 9 days together might sound like a nightmare to an introvert (a.k.a me). Hence it is very crucial to plan your time and acknowledge your own feelings throughout the project. 



Performing a mini-play of the eating habit during the Victorian era!



Having constantly being with people sounds really draining, and it IS draining. However, no man’s an island. As exaggerating as it may sound, every day was a struggle between me and myself, a silent inner battle for me to come out and be with people. As you probably or may not know, I am a huge introvert. This doesn’t means I’m extremely shy or hide away from people, it is just that my energy get drained in a lightning speed pace when I am with a lot of people, sometimes it got to the point of feeling overly emotionally overwhelmed that I need to coop back into my humble abode to rejuvenate for a while.


Hence, here’s an "ode" to my fellow introverts, some of the tips to not let you feel too overwhelmed with everything!:




3.  TIPS FOR AN INTROVERT

I. Put yourself out there

= Take this chance to venture and expand your social skills. During this short period of time, you can actually learn a lot more in communicating and socialising with others. Try to find people who have the same interest as you and strike up a conversation! You might find the one (s) who are on the same wavelength as you! 


Ii. Don’t think, just be present

= Do not just be intimidated with the idea of meeting new people. Try to instil the feeling of ‘excitement and curiosity’ for this chance. Resorting to hiding yourself and overthinking all time will just exhaust your brain and mental even more than actually acting on the idea of socialising. You will never know when some conversations with these people might struck a chord inside yourself, and let you to think of something you never have imagined before (:


 Iii. Recognise your own feelings, it is OKAY to be yourself

= But still at the end of the day, you are still you. Do not force yourself to exceed your limit and pretend to be someone else that’s outgoing and all. You will lose all the fun and get dreaded by the end of the day. Be in tune with your feelings and be honest of your intention on socialising. If you notice your social battery has dropped to a critical percentage, retreat and give some space for yourself to reflect and recharge. After all, we are built differently and uniquely. No one will make a big fuss if you are just spending time alone in your bubble of comfort, being alone is not a crime!



After the presentation, selfie with our cute Earth drawings


with the Romanian team, so grateful to meet these lovely people!


4.  FOR THE FUTURE: WHAT ASPECTS I WOULD LIKE TO EXPAND + MY EXPECTATIONS

= No doubt, I would love to join more Erasmus+ Youth Exchange projects in the future. I believe it is such a golden opportunity that every youth should grab! Not just you will learn something new while also travelling to an unfamiliar place, but you will get to venture out of your comfort zone, exploring new cultures, forming friendship bonds and might also finding your own voice in an unimaginable way (:

My hopes are:

  • In the future, I hope I can be more involved and confident in voicing out my thoughts and opinions. I always limit myself and put on a wall that it is hard for me to be more open to people (especially to a huge group!), but I need to practise to put myself out there and not worrying too much. 
  • I hope to be more engaged in the discussions and other activities! 
  • To write an Eramus+ journal. I think having a journal to list down what I learnt throughout the day and incorporating reflection time by the end of the day would help me to organise and declutter my brain and be more mindful for the next day.
  • DO NOT OVERPACK!!! Perioddtt!!! I suffered a lot due to overpacking because my luggage was damaged just right after I landed at Zagreb (talking about misfortune!!). Hence, it was an excruciating struggle to carry my luggage everywhere :’) #lessonlearnt

 

I guess that’s all for now. I wrote quite a lot and it took me 2-3 days for the brainstorming and writing! Hope this will be beneficial for any of you who are planning to go for an Erasmus+ Youth Exchange Project. I promise, you won’t regret it! (: (well, if you set the right mindset for it, of course).


Thank you for reading till the end! Have a great day ahead (:

 



SOME PICTS (: -



Energiser session to wake up everyone before the presentation by the Romanian team!

Presenting about the History of Food by the Romanian team







Winter to Spring Transition!

15 Apr 2022

 





Assalamualaikum everyone! I think it has been quite a while since I last wrote a proper blog post. After procrastinating and ruminating for quite a time, I decided that it is going to be more beneficial for me to write here so I could reminisce about my past through my written posts (:



So, how have the past months gone by?


C O N T E N T
1. Finishing the first semester in Romania
2. Winter Blues
3. Spring & Physical Class


1. Finishing the first semester in Romania

It has been a rough journey through the first semester of learning the Romanian language. I arrived in Bucharest on 2nd November 2022 and started the class on 29th of November, 4 weeks after my arrival here. The academic calendar started on the 1st of October, which means I'm left behind with 2 months worth of classes. Because of that, we had to accelerate our learning, having extra classes on public holidays and also on Saturdays. Though it is online, that also means a huge challenge to just stay put in front of the laptop all day long concentrating on the lectures without break from the sunrise till the sunset ( we only had like 2 breaks of 10 minutes for the whole day!). However, thankfully, my professors are the LOVELIEST and the KINDEST ever. I'm sure it is also not easy for them to teach us as (for unknown reasons) most of my classmates are always absent. There were times when I was the only one in the class so it felt like I'm having an oral test with my professor 😳😂


Nevertheless, I managed to finish the first semester with flying colours despite all the hecticness!



My Sem 1 APLR Result



So the grading system in Romania follows a scale of 1-10 (in which 10 is the highest mark). I was really astounded to get a 10 for all subjects! Alhamdulillah 💜




2. Winter Blues

-it's not a joke. Living in a country with no 4 seasons, I've only heard the term 'winter blues' from the media and from reading. Now that I'm here, experiencing my first winter in life, I FINALLY FEEL IT. Not that it is a good thing. It felt really really terrible and dreadful. But first, what is Winter Blues?


What is the meaning of winter blues?

Having the winter blues means feeling sad and generally more down in the dumps, according to the National Institutes of Health (NIH). Winter blues isn't something that is medically diagnosed, but more of an understood feeling we can sometimes have during winter months that is usually short-lived.

https://www.premierhealth.com/faq/what-does-it-mean-to-have-the-winter-blues- 

The winter blues is a mental state comprised of feelings of sadness and fatigue during the coldest and darkest months of the year. It may be hard to get out of bed some mornings, you may have trouble sleeping and you may feel unmotivated to complete daily tasks or to get outside.

https://www.verywellmind.com/winter-blues-vs-seasonal-affective-disorder-5101512

*Not to be mistaken with Seasonal Depression (SAD), which is a lot more severe and diagnosed by a doctor.


Imagine you just arrived in a strange land, far faaaar away from your family, coming from a place where everywhere is green, to a place where the nature seems to be dead, the freezing coldness kissing your skin, the gloomy sky, being alone and only stuck in the room in front of the laptop for months... All these conditions added up and made me feel sad and dejected all time for no reason. I started to look at things on the negative side, having no energy to do anything, and being too immersed in the silly thoughts that end up consuming me as a whole. I MISSSS the dazzling sun, the greenies, and the warmth. This is also due to the reason for the pandemic, where we can't really socialize freely, have student activities, and attend physical classes. This phase (December 2021 - February 2022) has been the hardest phase for me trying to cope with the homesickness, adapting, studying, and fighting this winter blues! 











But now thank goodness it is


3. Spring & Physical Classes!

The covid19 cases reported in Romania, especially Bucharest aren't looking very good during the time. But I guess the world is getting tired of the ever-changing and inconsistency of restrictions and regulations. Hence, on the third (or fourth) week of the second semester, we get to go back to school! Finally!

After spending almost 4 months in solitary and having online classes, I finally get to live the university student life! Though I had to spend 2 hours commuting daily to my uni every day because my dormitory is far from the uni (+ the buzzing traffic jam of Bucharest), I still enjoy my time at the uni! It feels a lot LOT better than being stuck in the room and having headaches after every zoom class. 

Also the timing, it's the start of SPRING! What a beautiful time to go to the uni. Though in the past few days it feels like we are coming back to winter because of the weird cold weather again (it even snowed in some of Romania's cities!??). Anyway, it just feels very nice and fulfilling to live the life as a normal university student (:








And now that's the end of my life update! It feels surreal that it has been almost 6 months since I am here? Half of a year!?? It is true when people say as you grow up, time passes lot faster, and in just a whim, the youth is gone and all is left are memories and regrets (':

I will be ending my language learning in July, I have about 2 months to prepare before my exams (a LOT lot of exams) start at the end of May!! @.@  Will be veryyyyy busy. (But that's life anyway!)

So,

I guess that's all? 
Thank you for reading till the end,
Have a beautiful day ahead! 


Te doresc o zi frumoasă </3 








București Log #2 - Turning 20.

10 Feb 2022

​10 February, Tucano Coffee, Bucuresti. 16:00, Iarnă.


It’s my late birthday! 

I turn 20 this year, I know, crazy.

The me who turned 19 last year would not have expected that I’ll be thousand and thousand miles away from my family, my friends, in another country, another continent, another ‘life’.


Since I arrived here, it has been nothing but a turbulent, rough, patchy road. Most probably because I was alone, which is very unexpected considering I thought I could survive being alone by myself anywhere. But, it you’ll most probably be prone to this devastating state, especially when you are barely 19, being in a country where you are the obvious minority, not having anyone to guide you. It’s just you, and this estranged world.



I guess those few months has taught me some life lessons that i learnt the hard way;


1. No man is an island. 

As cliché as it sounds, and as reluctant as I am to admit it, there is a reason why we are born in a world where we need to be in society. No matter how ‘independent’ you are, sometimes you need to tear down the wall, and ask people for their hand.


2. It IS an EFFORT to make friends. 

Growing up, I think relationships and friendships comes naturally that i don’t even need to think about it, from my classmates, my neighbours of the same age, the junior and the seniors in our school, and our family. I don’t think so I have ever been in a situation where I really need to put me myself out there and struggling and desperate to find ‘another soul’ to befriend with. Now, I need to allocate the time myself to go out and interact with people, and remembering to keep in touch with them after some time before we drifted away and be back to stranger point. It is hard, but the human interaction is also what i need the most as an international student. 


And afterwards

3. Balancing your life and the social life.

 It is nice when you got to know a lot from people, friends of your friends and all. BUT, as a huge introvert, it gets overwhelming at times. And that’s the moment I need to start drawing lines back, to not let myself be ‘drowned’ in the presence of others. It is very hard to keep the balance between them, especially since I never ‘learn’ nor ‘experienced’ this kind of situation before. For now, it is enough for me to allocate one day in a week for ‘socialising’. It will take me a few days to recharge, and then I can use my energy again for study, and other things.


4. You are the sailor of your own ship. 

Coming here, it is like a reset button. Like a toddler who plays with the building blocks, acting like an architect in building the tallest tower, but then the towers crumble down, again and again.


That’s me, I felt like a toddler, with no prior knowledge nor talent in being an ‘architect’, in my case it is in being a ‘human’. I never get to ‘drive’ my own life, it was all set to me; going to school, studying, joining the allocated clubs and programs, and that’s all.


Now I’m here, there’s no one who tell me what to do, or someone who I can follow. It all’s up to me. I need to seek out there, try and error, like dipping your french fries to different kinds of sauces, to find the one that is the most to your liking. 


This is the hardest and the longest thing to do, because preferences changes, people changes, circumstances changes. I need to set my priority, juggle between them, and find my own ‘colour’, so I do not only live to ‘live’, but also to ‘feel’ the life (:


So in short, the biggest lessons are about relationships with humans and ‘being human’.


Pretty much a ‘welcome to adulthood’-existential-kind-of-realisations. Haha.


I do not know whether I will be okay along the way, which is very unlikely considering the rough path I’m choosing right now. But well,


you’re 20 right now. (:



Some photo dumps-





Can you see that I am trying to love the city?
















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