21.08.25 jakarta macet

 (a short prose i wrote back in summer this year)

I stumbled upon a post where someone said that maybe ‘we’ are born in Indonesia so we can have more empathy.

And that hits me hard in the gut.

Growing up in a relatively more comfortable environment in Malaysia, I couldn’t help but to compare it with my hometown. Where the huge gap between different social classes is too apparent. 

When I can comfortably sit in the car, manuevering around Jakarta and enjoying the beautiful places and delicacies, there are people on the road, enduring the scorching heat, bathed in sweat, dragging themselves against embarrassment to sell things amidst the chaos of traffic jam.  

I used to complain about the traffic jam, or ‘macet’, and the lack of traffic lights in big roads. But maybe these conditions come as blessings in disguise, to give the ‘space’ for those to find the means to eat, to survive.

The guilt of being able to enjoy life churned in my stomach from times to times, not just because of the frustration towards the systemic issues that persisted for generations; ‘the rich gets richer, and the poor gets poorer’, but also because sometimes i’m blinded by my own greed that I forget about the blessings and privileges that Allah has bestowed to me.

I kept looking up in resentment, rather than looking down in gratitude.

These internal conflicts disgust me. Yet it exemplified how humans greed serve no limit; enough is nonexistant. 

My wish is that I can keep myself grounded and present, so I can cherish what I have. After all, everything that I ‘own’ now are titipan dari Allah, and that all of it will be questioned by Allah once we leave the Earth; 

‘have you been responsible with what you have, did you use them for goodness, or did you menzalimi other people through your means?’

may Allah protect us all always, amin.

9:32 am on the way to Ambasada de Franța, Jakarta

21.08.25