Law School Episode 12 Thoughts!!!

Hello everyone!

Few weeks ago, I've finished this one drama JTBC Law School. I am not a fan of legal drama as I find myself always getting lost in the process of it, my mind is too slow to catch up the fast-pace storyline of legal dramas. I've watched some before, but never particularly being too much invested into it. This is the very first legal drama that my mind actually enjoy! Though the main premise is about revealing the truth of the murder of Professor Seo Byung Ju, I would say that wasn't the main focus of this drama. One by one, the story unravel the truth and secrets of each of the students (that epic squad), each of them have their own backstory and goals they want to achieve. And coincidentally, all are related to Prof Seo Byung Ju. His death was the trigger of the further action taken by the students.

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I've written a rant on this one episode that literally keeps me on the edge of my sit the whole hour, and let me ponder upon it for a long time;

SPOILER ALERT (Episode 12) !!!

1. Power manipulation over law 

As we can see, that scumbag Assemblyman Ko diverted all the media attention to Bad Fama Case. He garnered all his resources to sweep his son's case under the rag. It disgusted me to see the law OBEYED down to his power even though law supposed to possess the authority power above everything. This reflects the sickening situation in our world where the law only protects those who have the power, and instead, did injustice to the poor citizens. It was utterly satisfying to see Professor Attorney Yang to go against the odd and won the trial without any dirty tactics, instead just sticking to the facts and logic. As usual, I am the most invested during Professor Yang's courtroom/lecture session. The fact he got to pull back the audiences judgement from getting swayed by the crafted story of the prosecutors, to stick to the fact and logic reasoning amazed me. Also, I love how the juries leaned to Professor Yang's explanation of ''beyond reasonable doubt'' by the end of the trial, which pretty much explains his internal skills in lecturing criminal law in a simpler form even for those who have the slightest knowledge of the legal terms! 

This reminds me to a famous saying: 

''If you can't explain it to a six year old, you don't understand it yourself''. 

- Albert Einstein 

I can't wait for Assemblyman Ko AND his son to get pushed down the hill of destruction and shame. Gosh knows what disaster could be with the existence of those kind of monsters in our society, even worse when possessing the POWER above citizens' life!

2. Professor's Yang Undivided Attention Towards His Students

As we all know. He is notorious popular as the 'Killer Lecturer' aka Yangcrates. Yup as in Yang (His Last/Family name) + Socrates, the notable Greek Philosopher. Though torturing students the most mentally is what they see of him, but deep inside, he actually have a great attention and care towards his own students. And obviously he won't say it out aloud nor admit it.

He would be the epitome of  "Action speak louder than words."

   Though he is cornered in the corner because of his trial, he still came out and volunteered to be Ye-Seul's lawyer when no lawyer dare to represent her in afraid of Jerk Ko. His decision of requesting a jury trial was a double-edge sword decision, but we all know he would never take a risk without having an incredible plan in the back of his mind. 

   I think the most emotional scene was when he 'resigned' as her lawyer, because 'his client herself is not defending herself'. He turned the situation into lecturer-student interrogation situation just like in his usual lecturers, driving Ye-Seul into objectively study her own case. Though it was mentally cruel, but it was the last strike needed for Ye-Seul to make her own breakthrough and save herself. 

Which brings me to the last discussion;

3. Ye-Seul Defying The Victim-Blaming Projection

Since the start of the accident, she's been apologizing to that jerk ex of her as she still believes that it was her fault. The people on his side has been keeping her on edge by manipulating her into thinking she committed a fatal crime and responsible for life. But after Professor Yang turned the trial into his 'lecture' session in which they are 'studying' Ye-Seul's case, he let Ye-Seul to break through her situation and see herself objectively from a third-point-of view.

   You know that we tend to give advice or a way out to others easily, but not to ourselves when we are in a freaking same situation? It's because we are trapped in our own jumble of feelings and judgements, clouded by these internal and external factors that impeded us from helping our own self from the disasters.

   I think Professor Yang's way of leading her to see her own self from the third eyes help her to think more rationally and not be apologetic to whatever guilts she had before. And this was the scene that leaves me in awe. And makes me realize how easy it is for people to set us in this cage of self-blaming, projecting all the blames to the 'self-prisoner' in the cage, rather than extending a hand to help.

   I'm really glad that in the end, Ye-Seul managed to stand on her own feet, defending her own self without needing to depend on the others. The writer is so brilliant to make the event turn this way. It's even more impactful than letting Professor Yang giving out logic arguments that could turn the trial over in a second, finishing it all by once. Insted, the writer-nim let Ye-Seul to shine and hold the ultimate power. I think this scene was so gripping and emotional, and I hope this will inspire the poor souls who are in the same situation of her to stand up and defy all the resistance. 

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Updates:

The last time I wrote this was on August 2021, and now it is the end of August 2022! I got tired of writing halfway because of the spiralling emotions inside me that is hard to explain by writing which got me frustrated because I was unable to convey my entire feelings and thoughts! ANyWay, after almost a year I came back to this draft that has been hiding in my blog for a year, and I think, it is actually already completed? I actually just need to refine a lil bit and just click the PUBLISH button. Being a perfectionist, it doesn't really baffle me why I left this when it was already 90% completed lol. But I think this is still worth it to be read by people, so.... here we go!

Please share me your thoughts too on this drama <3 I would love to read them! 

*pict courtesy of Pinterest

Erasmus+ Croatia Experience 2022

About 1.5 months ago whilst dealing with the final exams of my language preparatory year, I applied to Erasmus+ Youth Exchange programs for the first time in my life. And thankfully I was accepted to a project which resonates well with what I am interested in; healthcare, medicine and diseases.

 

Just 2 weeks ago, I was at a small cozy town of Samobor in Croatia with about 50 inspiring youths from 5 countries; Spain, Turkey, The Netherlands, Croatia and Romania. We came together to exchange ideas and organise workshops whilst having fun and creating the best memories together. Since it was my first time joining such a program, I did not know what to expect, nor to prepare. Hence, I am writing this to document my experience there and for you to catch a glimpse on how this project works! 

TABLE OF CONTENTS:

1.0 What is an Erasmus+ Youth Exchange Project? 

2.0 “Sweet, Sweet Life Project”

        2.1 What Did I Learn (Objectives)

        2.2 What Did I Learn (Self-reflection)

3.0 Tips For An Introvert

4.0 For The Future: What Aspects I Would Like To Expand, My Expectations

1.       WHAT IS AN ERASMUS+ YOUTH EXCHANGE PROJECT?

 

According to the European Youth Portal…

“Youth exchanges will give you the possibility to live together with other youngsters for a short period of time and to work together on a common project. You’ll take part in activities like workshops, debates, intercultural evenings, sportive and artistic activities, role-plays, meetings with the locals, outdoor activities and much more. Finally, your learning experiences will be recognised through a Youthpass, a tool which recognises learning outcomes from youth work and solidarity activities.”

 - by Erasmus+ Youth Exchanges: all you need to know | European Youth Portal (europa.eu)

 

So, it is basically an exchange program that allows you to mingle with youths of different nationalities to gain and exchange knowledge about a particular topic in accordance to the objectives of the project, a.k.a, a fun and engaging way to learn about life! 

2.  “SWEET, SWEET LIFE PROJECT”

The program I joined is called “Sweet, Sweet Life” and the project focuses on the awareness of diabetes and healthy lifestyle. I am glad to be able to join this as health and diseases is also my interest, especially since I’ll be studying biochemistry in the university, this would be really beneficial for my external knowledge! I was sent as a delegate of the Romanian team by a lovely Romanian Youth organization called Asociatia ASTRID. This project was organised by a Croatian organization called Impress. 

 

This whole project took place at a lovely and cozy hostel called Hostel Samobor, which is located just a few minutes walk from the city centre! We spent our days there for 9 days from 1st of August till 9th of August. I really enjoyed my stay there as the place is really beautiful and accessible. 

Though the project is about diabetes and joined by a lot of people from medical background (a lot of medical students), the workshops and activities weren’t heavy and stoic. In fact, it was so chill yet we gained a lot of new knowledge. We learnt stuffs and also unlearnt the misconceptions and stereotypes of diabetes, working in a team to solve problems, exchanging thoughts and personal experiences, addressing the real life issues concerning diabetes, and the list goes on! My personal favourite is the discussion session when we get to pitch in our own ideas and listen to different points of views, which collectively and ultimately result in a thought-provoking momentum!

DETAILS OF THE PROJECT

The aim of this project is to bring together young people with and without diabetes in order to empower each other, to become more aware about challenges people with chronical health conditions (in this case diabetes) face and to try to change the perspective on which diabetes is perceived in society.

Date: 1-9 August 2022

Place: Samobor, Croatia

Our first picture together

2.1 WHAT DID I LEARN (OBJECTIVES)

O1: to learn about diabetes together and to understand it better

= For sure I learnt a lot about diabetes, ranging from medical facts, personal experiences from diabetic participants (note= everyone has their own journey and experience! You can’t make an assumption and conclusion just based on one diabetic person), and debunking the myths of living with diabetes (ex= diabetics can’t consume sugar at all, a TOTAL MYTH, sugar; glucose and carbs are essential for every organism). Since the participants are from different backgrounds and specialities, we were able to exchange information more efficiently and in a holistic way. 

 

O2: to provide space to discuss about diabetes openly: views, experiences, feelings, uncertainties etc.

= A very needed opportunity to openly exchange ideas and inputs is what I am most grateful of during this project. This allows us to deepen our initial knowledge about diabetes, be more critical in ingesting new information, and improve the multi-cultural understandings that would differ the way each culture perceives and thinks of diabetes. 

 

O3: to break the taboo of living with chronic health condition such as diabetes and to learn how to react positively in certain situations

= Oftentimes, we perceive people living with diseases in a not so positive light, such as associating them with poor lifestyle, the inability to take care of their health, or even throwing audacious assumptions just based on their outer appearance. However, through listening directly from the personal experiences of people suffering from certain diseases (not just limited to diabetes) from this project, it teaches us to be more empathetic and mindful towards others as every diabetic person has different journey and struggles!

 

O4: to emphasise the relevance of living a balanced life in preventing (or handling) diabetes: eating healthy and balanced, sleeping enough, doing sports, avoiding stress etc.

= Through all the workshops collectively, we got to learn the various aspects of life that affect our health. The inputs and advice shared from the workshops are very crucial for us to be more mindful of everything to live a healthy life. In particular, the stress management sessions are necessary as frequently, we tend to dismiss the stress and cope through it in an unhealthy way without realising that it’s slowly reducing the quality of life and making us more prone to sickness and diseases. 

Presentation about a food product we came up to facilitate diabetic people

2.2 WHAT DID I LEARN (SELF-REFLECTION)

Joining this project has definitely grown me a lot as a person. Especially when you are suddenly thrown into a sea of people (in this case, ~50 people) from different nationalities and backgrounds, living with them for a straight 9 days, it forced you to go out of your comfort zone and be open to new experience!

1. Be more aware and emphatic towards the diabetics!

Diabetes is a metabolic disorder that can't be seen with the naked eyes, hence, we'll never know if someone around us is suffering from it unless we're getting informed beforehand. Oftentimes, they have the internal struggle that makes them feel the need to 'prove' their sickness because without the visible symptoms, the others in their circle will take it lightly or just brush it off which makes it harder for them to voice out their dietary concerns and explain it to the people. Hence, we need to be more aware and be open to those who are suffering from diabetes and other auto-immune diseases so that they do not feel excluded or 'unfit' to socialise with the others!

2. Intercultural communication

= Being in a huge group of diverse people of different nations, it is very important to be more culturally-aware towards one another. It’s necessary to set a mind of openness and tolerance, because we are not brought up in the same aquarium. Hence, having empathy and tolerance is very essential to avoid misunderstandings and cultural miscommunication! 

3. Set a growing mindset!

= At some points, there are times when I feel inadequate or not outspoken and confident enough like the others. But after finishing the project, I realised that it was such a dumb thing to succumb to those feelings and ruminate about it all time! This project is a place for you to grow yourself as a person, no matter in what aspect it is, you will not be the same person as when you first came to the project.

 Everyone has their own struggles so don’t be too hard on yourself (: 

Especially if it is your first project, it is totally understandable you will feel lost most of the time. Just go with the flow and see how you transcend to a new version of yourself. 

4.  Balancing Between Socialising and Reflection

= To be thrown into a sea of 50 people and having to spend a whopping 9 days together might sound like a nightmare to an introvert (a.k.a me). Hence it is very crucial to plan your time and acknowledge your own feelings throughout the project. 

Performing a mini-play of the eating habit during the Victorian era!

Having constantly being with people sounds really draining, and it IS draining. However, no man’s an island. As exaggerating as it may sound, every day was a struggle between me and myself, a silent inner battle for me to come out and be with people. As you probably or may not know, I am a huge introvert. This doesn’t means I’m extremely shy or hide away from people, it is just that my energy get drained in a lightning speed pace when I am with a lot of people, sometimes it got to the point of feeling overly emotionally overwhelmed that I need to coop back into my humble abode to rejuvenate for a while.

Hence, here’s an "ode" to my fellow introverts, some of the tips to not let you feel too overwhelmed with everything!:

3.  TIPS FOR AN INTROVERT

I. Put yourself out there

= Take this chance to venture and expand your social skills. During this short period of time, you can actually learn a lot more in communicating and socialising with others. Try to find people who have the same interest as you and strike up a conversation! You might find the one (s) who are on the same wavelength as you! 

Ii. Don’t think, just be present

= Do not just be intimidated with the idea of meeting new people. Try to instil the feeling of ‘excitement and curiosity’ for this chance. Resorting to hiding yourself and overthinking all time will just exhaust your brain and mental even more than actually acting on the idea of socialising. You will never know when some conversations with these people might struck a chord inside yourself, and let you to think of something you never have imagined before (:

 Iii. Recognise your own feelings, it is OKAY to be yourself

= But still at the end of the day, you are still you. Do not force yourself to exceed your limit and pretend to be someone else that’s outgoing and all. You will lose all the fun and get dreaded by the end of the day. Be in tune with your feelings and be honest of your intention on socialising. If you notice your social battery has dropped to a critical percentage, retreat and give some space for yourself to reflect and recharge. After all, we are built differently and uniquely. No one will make a big fuss if you are just spending time alone in your bubble of comfort, being alone is not a crime!

After the presentation, selfie with our cute Earth drawings

with the Romanian team, so grateful to meet these lovely people!

4.  FOR THE FUTURE: WHAT ASPECTS I WOULD LIKE TO EXPAND + MY EXPECTATIONS

= No doubt, I would love to join more Erasmus+ Youth Exchange projects in the future. I believe it is such a golden opportunity that every youth should grab! Not just you will learn something new while also travelling to an unfamiliar place, but you will get to venture out of your comfort zone, exploring new cultures, forming friendship bonds and might also finding your own voice in an unimaginable way (:

My hopes are:

• In the future, I hope I can be more involved and confident in voicing out my thoughts and opinions. I always limit myself and put on a wall that it is hard for me to be more open to people (especially to a huge group!), but I need to practise to put myself out there and not worrying too much. 
• I hope to be more engaged in the discussions and other activities! 
• To write an Eramus+ journal. I think having a journal to list down what I learnt throughout the day and incorporating reflection time by the end of the day would help me to organise and declutter my brain and be more mindful for the next day.
• DO NOT OVERPACK!!! Perioddtt!!! I suffered a lot due to overpacking because my luggage was damaged just right after I landed at Zagreb (talking about misfortune!!). Hence, it was an excruciating struggle to carry my luggage everywhere :’) #lessonlearnt

 

I guess that’s all for now. I wrote quite a lot and it took me 2-3 days for the brainstorming and writing! Hope this will be beneficial for any of you who are planning to go for an Erasmus+ Youth Exchange Project. I promise, you won’t regret it! (: (well, if you set the right mindset for it, of course).

Thank you for reading till the end! Have a great day ahead (:

 

SOME PICTS (: -

Energiser session to wake up everyone before the presentation by the Romanian team!

Presenting about the History of Food by the Romanian team

Winter to Spring Transition!

 

Assalamualaikum everyone! I think it has been quite a while since I last wrote a proper blog post. After procrastinating and ruminating for quite a time, I decided that it is going to be more beneficial for me to write here so I could reminisce about my past through my written posts (:

So, how have the past months gone by?

C O N T E N T
1. Finishing the first semester in Romania
2. Winter Blues
3. Spring & Physical Class

1. Finishing the first semester in Romania

It has been a rough journey through the first semester of learning the Romanian language. I arrived in Bucharest on 2nd November 2022 and started the class on 29th of November, 4 weeks after my arrival here. The academic calendar started on the 1st of October, which means I'm left behind with 2 months worth of classes. Because of that, we had to accelerate our learning, having extra classes on public holidays and also on Saturdays. Though it is online, that also means a huge challenge to just stay put in front of the laptop all day long concentrating on the lectures without break from the sunrise till the sunset ( we only had like 2 breaks of 10 minutes for the whole day!). However, thankfully, my professors are the LOVELIEST and the KINDEST ever. I'm sure it is also not easy for them to teach us as (for unknown reasons) most of my classmates are always absent. There were times when I was the only one in the class so it felt like I'm having an oral test with my professor 😳😂

Nevertheless, I managed to finish the first semester with flying colours despite all the hecticness!

My Sem 1 APLR Result

So the grading system in Romania follows a scale of 1-10 (in which 10 is the highest mark). I was really astounded to get a 10 for all subjects! Alhamdulillah 💜

2. Winter Blues

-it's not a joke. Living in a country with no 4 seasons, I've only heard the term 'winter blues' from the media and from reading. Now that I'm here, experiencing my first winter in life, I FINALLY FEEL IT. Not that it is a good thing. It felt really really terrible and dreadful. But first, what is Winter Blues?

What is the meaning of winter blues?

Having the winter blues means feeling sad and generally more down in the dumps, according to the National Institutes of Health (NIH). Winter blues isn't something that is medically diagnosed, but more of an understood feeling we can sometimes have during winter months that is usually short-lived.

- https://www.premierhealth.com/faq/what-does-it-mean-to-have-the-winter-blues- 

The winter blues is a mental state comprised of feelings of sadness and fatigue during the coldest and darkest months of the year. It may be hard to get out of bed some mornings, you may have trouble sleeping and you may feel unmotivated to complete daily tasks or to get outside.

- https://www.verywellmind.com/winter-blues-vs-seasonal-affective-disorder-5101512

*Not to be mistaken with Seasonal Depression (SAD), which is a lot more severe and diagnosed by a doctor.

Imagine you just arrived in a strange land, far faaaar away from your family, coming from a place where everywhere is green, to a place where the nature seems to be dead, the freezing coldness kissing your skin, the gloomy sky, being alone and only stuck in the room in front of the laptop for months... All these conditions added up and made me feel sad and dejected all time for no reason. I started to look at things on the negative side, having no energy to do anything, and being too immersed in the silly thoughts that end up consuming me as a whole. I MISSSS the dazzling sun, the greenies, and the warmth. This is also due to the reason for the pandemic, where we can't really socialize freely, have student activities, and attend physical classes. This phase (December 2021 - February 2022) has been the hardest phase for me trying to cope with the homesickness, adapting, studying, and fighting this winter blues! 

But now thank goodness it is

3. Spring & Physical Classes!

The covid19 cases reported in Romania, especially Bucharest aren't looking very good during the time. But I guess the world is getting tired of the ever-changing and inconsistency of restrictions and regulations. Hence, on the third (or fourth) week of the second semester, we get to go back to school! Finally!

After spending almost 4 months in solitary and having online classes, I finally get to live the university student life! Though I had to spend 2 hours commuting daily to my uni every day because my dormitory is far from the uni (+ the buzzing traffic jam of Bucharest), I still enjoy my time at the uni! It feels a lot LOT better than being stuck in the room and having headaches after every zoom class. 

Also the timing, it's the start of SPRING! What a beautiful time to go to the uni. Though in the past few days it feels like we are coming back to winter because of the weird cold weather again (it even snowed in some of Romania's cities!??). Anyway, it just feels very nice and fulfilling to live the life as a normal university student (:

And now that's the end of my life update! It feels surreal that it has been almost 6 months since I am here? Half of a year!?? It is true when people say as you grow up, time passes lot faster, and in just a whim, the youth is gone and all is left are memories and regrets (':

I will be ending my language learning in July, I have about 2 months to prepare before my exams (a LOT lot of exams) start at the end of May!! @.@  Will be veryyyyy busy. (But that's life anyway!)

So,

I guess that's all? 

Thank you for reading till the end,

Have a beautiful day ahead! 

Te doresc o zi frumoasă </3 

București Log #2 - Turning 20.

​10 February, Tucano Coffee, Bucuresti. 16:00, Iarnă.

It’s my late birthday! 

I turn 20 this year, I know, crazy.

The me who turned 19 last year would not have expected that I’ll be thousand and thousand miles away from my family, my friends, in another country, another continent, another ‘life’.

Since I arrived here, it has been nothing but a turbulent, rough, patchy road. Most probably because I was alone, which is very unexpected considering I thought I could survive being alone by myself anywhere. But, it you’ll most probably be prone to this devastating state, especially when you are barely 19, being in a country where you are the obvious minority, not having anyone to guide you. It’s just you, and this estranged world.

I guess those few months has taught me some life lessons that i learnt the hard way;

1. No man is an island. 

As cliché as it sounds, and as reluctant as I am to admit it, there is a reason why we are born in a world where we need to be in society. No matter how ‘independent’ you are, sometimes you need to tear down the wall, and ask people for their hand.

2. It IS an EFFORT to make friends. 

Growing up, I think relationships and friendships comes naturally that i don’t even need to think about it, from my classmates, my neighbours of the same age, the junior and the seniors in our school, and our family. I don’t think so I have ever been in a situation where I really need to put me myself out there and struggling and desperate to find ‘another soul’ to befriend with. Now, I need to allocate the time myself to go out and interact with people, and remembering to keep in touch with them after some time before we drifted away and be back to stranger point. It is hard, but the human interaction is also what i need the most as an international student. 

And afterwards

3. Balancing your life and the social life.

 It is nice when you got to know a lot from people, friends of your friends and all. BUT, as a huge introvert, it gets overwhelming at times. And that’s the moment I need to start drawing lines back, to not let myself be ‘drowned’ in the presence of others. It is very hard to keep the balance between them, especially since I never ‘learn’ nor ‘experienced’ this kind of situation before. For now, it is enough for me to allocate one day in a week for ‘socialising’. It will take me a few days to recharge, and then I can use my energy again for study, and other things.

4. You are the sailor of your own ship. 

Coming here, it is like a reset button. Like a toddler who plays with the building blocks, acting like an architect in building the tallest tower, but then the towers crumble down, again and again.

That’s me, I felt like a toddler, with no prior knowledge nor talent in being an ‘architect’, in my case it is in being a ‘human’. I never get to ‘drive’ my own life, it was all set to me; going to school, studying, joining the allocated clubs and programs, and that’s all.

Now I’m here, there’s no one who tell me what to do, or someone who I can follow. It all’s up to me. I need to seek out there, try and error, like dipping your french fries to different kinds of sauces, to find the one that is the most to your liking. 

This is the hardest and the longest thing to do, because preferences changes, people changes, circumstances changes. I need to set my priority, juggle between them, and find my own ‘colour’, so I do not only live to ‘live’, but also to ‘feel’ the life (:

So in short, the biggest lessons are about relationships with humans and ‘being human’.

Pretty much a ‘welcome to adulthood’-existential-kind-of-realisations. Haha.

I do not know whether I will be okay along the way, which is very unlikely considering the rough path I’m choosing right now. But well,

you’re 20 right now. (:

Some photo dumps-

Can you see that I am trying to love the city?

București Log #1 - A Self Date

 The 23rd day in this strange land.

The past 3 weeks have been a horrid ride of confusion mixed with isolating loneliness that I would have never thought before. It might have driven me astray and crazy if I do not cling to the faith, and to the loved ones who sought out for me. The first night here, I was totally broken. Having been away from my parents with 5,383 miles distance in between the two longing sides, I realize I have no one anymore to rely on. All I have is me, myself, and Allah. 

I've been constantly on the run, running and running, to settle all the bureaucracy and settling down. There has never been a day where I can lay rest on the bed, and listen to the heart. My mind and heart is in havoc, and it still is.

After two weeks, I have no tears left to shed, or at least I thought so. It dries up just like the Euphrates River. Having no one to talk to, it was suffocating. For the three weeks, I have no one to talk to. The language barrier worsens it all. But at least, I'm still able to contact my parents, and my one dear friend who is always be there for me despite having a crazily-packed life too. However, as the winter is approaching, the clock went back for one hour, adding to the already distant 5 hours time differences. A 6 hours differences make it difficult to call one's back. 

As all the difficulties, anxiousness, insecurities and the loneliness began to swallow me up, I finally opened and poured my heart to my loved ones. And for my that one precious friend, that sacrificed her sleeping hours for me, we talked for hours and hours. I was in a total turbulence, having internal problem that I might burst to crying at any times. 

And she gave me this one advice; to do the unexpected, to treat yourself, and to let your heart crawl out. And I did give it a try, it was the happiest moment since I arrived here.

I hopped on the bus and went to Piața Unirii, and let myself wonder around by its own. I finally slow done, and appreciate the magnificent buildings and its people. My main purpose is to actually go to visit the small second-hand bookstore just nearby the metro station. I browsed the books and unfortunately most of them are in Romanian, which I could not decipher yet. However, I did a favour of myself and picked the Romanian translation of Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, with the Romanian title of Mândrie și prejudecată. I talked briefly to the seller who's actually very kind and told me he could bring some Romanian learning book if I want! He told me all girls love P&P and I am 11/10 agree with that, it's my all-time favourite classic story that I wish to read over and over again (:

I went into a valley, and finally it feels like I am truly at Europe, at last. It was intimidating, to be honest. I turn the wrong side and entered a wrong valley which is full of closed pubs and bars, for a midget hijabi girl walking alone, I am scared. But I went through using the map app, and found myself at a lively valley of restaurants full of people. A cramped road, surrounded by tall ancient buildings, it was a pleasure. 

And I found a Halal restaurant too over there! I'm guessing it might be Turkish. 

Then a friendly in-waiting waitress kindly give me the direction to a beautiful bookstore located just by the end of the street, and it is the bookstore that I've only seen on the instagram! It's called Cărturești Carusel București. I was in an utter awe, and I really love the book collection provided. 

After spending a 2 hours-ish there, I went out and walk for a little bit to the bus station. Along the way, I found another bookstore, which has a great collection of English books in a more affordable way. I can't hang out for long because I need to go home soon afterward. 

There's also a second-hand store right at the corner. As you probably know (or not know), I am a huge fan of second-hand store! Didn't buy anything because I am not in need of clothes right now, but I would like to visit it again soon for some pretty coats.

I stopped by for a moment at a Turkish Mart, which I frequent visit. Though I am saddened by the fact they put us in a dorm very far away from the university (about 45 minutes away), but at least a turkish shop is only 20 minutes away by walk from the dorm, so it's very convenient for me to supply my fridge with some halal ingredients.

And that, basically sums up the instantaneous self-date day I had. It was truly breathtaking to finally slow down the pace in my life and appreciate this new city that'll be the home of mine for the next 4 years (: I would like to spend more time with myself, and giving myself the chance to 'slowly jog', rather than running all time chasing the continuous life. 

Thank you for reading this till the end. Though it starts with a quite depressing note, I found peace by the end, at least for now. 

Hope you have a great day ahead,

o zi bună! </3

*here are some more picts I took of the streets

With love,

Heba

25/11/2021 

(18:10 Fall in București)

6 November 2021, first autumn

I feel in deep euphoric meeting fellow indonesians or even any muslims here, but whenever we part away, i

always find myself weeping silently knowing that i'm

alone all by myself. Time zone diff make it difficult to

contact my family when they are awake, when evening

approach here, it's already late night at home where

everyone sleeps. I wish to have at least a single soul

here to be a company on these gloomy and lonely

days, and all i ask is for a tough heart and strong will

to cope all this alone, by myself.

Dissonance

 Now that it becomes a reality, it kinda scares.